Haveil Havalim #209: Ahhhhh……Spring!

Ahhh….do you smell it, people? Either spring is in the air or there’s some old schnitzel rotting in my fridge. Whether or not I need to do some spring cleaning in the kitchen (don’t ask), let’s all enjoy Haveil Havalim #209, the first of the new season. Haveil Havalim is the weekly “blog carnival” of the Jewish/Israeli blogosphere, created by Soccer Dad and currently maintained by our friend Jack. I was planning to kick off this carnival with some cotton candy and clowns but due to the economic crisis, we’re forced to make some financial cutbacks. Fortunately, I was able to find a clown nearby who’s in need of work.

Sometimes it’s just too easy Actually he’s not so much a clown as a giant doodyhead.
(Ech omrim “doodyhead”? Israelis, help me out here.)

Unfortunately, it’s no joke that the world does find itself in the midst of the largest financial crisis since the Great Depression. Despite this, we Israelis have a way of rolling with the punches and taking things in stride. Just take Bank Leumi* for example. You’d think banks around the world would be a little nervous these days, but not this bank. There ain’t nothing that can’t be fixed by a little optimism, right, my loyal readers?

Oh no…you know where we’re going…they didn’t say it, did they? A BANK said it? On their WEBSITE??? Oh, dear G-d….

NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! “Up next, the Prime Minister “yiyeh b’seder”s the drying up of the Kinneret.(If you’re confused, feel free to read this Idiot’s Guide to Yiyeh B’seder.
And don’t worry….if you still don’t get it….yiyeh b’seder.
)

To the bloggers and readers around the world, enjoy the beginning of spring. Especially to everyone in Tel Aviv, where the weather this weekend was apparently….what?!?

Ok, I know we live near the beach but that’s just ridiculous.**

Ok, let’s get this wrap-up started. To What War Zone??? newcomers, welcome and feel free to take a look around. Enjoy, everybody, and have a good week!

Anti-Semitism

Shmuel Sokol of Torat Yisrael relays a personal story about anti-Semitism that he witnessed when he was in college.

Batya of Shiloh Musings pleads for the death penalty for Arab terrorists.

WHOO-HOO! Good times in Haveil Havalim! I do these categories alphabetically….maybe we shouldn’t start with something as fun as Anti-Semitism. How about antifreeze?

This week, Rick Rollbaum blogs about engine coolants and the upcoming coalition talks here.
(If you didn’t get it, ask somebody else.)

Culture
Home Shuling talks about a day that happens only every 28 years! (Shmulik’s Comet?)

Mordechai Torczyner of The Rebbetzin’s Husband shares a new perspective on life and aging called “amortality.” (In Hebrew, amortalatzia. I’m kidding yet there’s a 54% chance that it’s true.)

Robert Avrech of Seraphic Secret tells us why Hollywood is burning.

History
Shmuel Sokol of Torat Yisrael tells us about the Tiberius Crusader Castle.

Humor
Benji Lovitt of some old blog has another confusing Hebrew moment at work. At least he didn’t find a hair in his chumus. (Oh yeah. He did.)

Batya of Me-ander smiles as she starts to prepare for Pesach cleaning.

Toby Curwin of A Time of the Signs gives you a reason to sign up for Ulpan. (Ulpan is hilarious, everyone should do it.)

Mike in Midwood tackles the topic of halacha and lost cell phones and texting machines.

Heshy of Frum Satire tells us why frum girls should not go on Jdate.

Trip’n Mommy gives us a laugh in honor of the Passover season.

Israel
Maya of How to be Israeli tells us when to (and when to not) bargain. Oy, I think I just split an infinitive. (Yiyeh b’seder. Ech omrim “split infinitive”?)

Batya of Shiloh Musings says Olmert just passed this tragic “hot potato” to Bibi.

Harry of Israelity and the brand new Jerusalem.com reports on Helen Mirren’s visit to Tel Aviv to shoot a movie. (As if we need more shooting in the Middle East. Yuk yuk yuk….let’s move on.)

More Israelity reporting: Tel Aviv is a fashionable place as evidenced by not only clothes, but also the gourmet coffee and delicassies popping up everywhere.

Mordechai Torczyner of The Rebbetzin’s Husband reveals the anti-Israel bias of a CNN reporter.

Eric from The Israel Situation takes a look at Bibi and Lieberman and what their relationship means for the next government. Anthony Reich writes on the same blog why he wants his son to serve in the army.

Have you seen the ad for the Israeli missle company yet? Yourish.com features it here.

Yisrael Medad of My Right Word saw the ancient city of Shiloh on American TV. Sort of… He’s also upset at the chosen language of opponents of Jewish residency across the Green Line as he writes on his Jerusalem Post blog.

Joel of Religion and State in Israel gives his daily update on religion and state in Israel, talking about Likud and Yisrael Beiteinu’s coalition and what may happen when the Pope visits.
Ben-Yehudah of Esser Agaroth tells us what he thinks of some leftist protesters nearby and asks “how frum are you?” (In case you’re wondering, it doesn’t get any frummer than me. I’m wearing three kittels.)

Guess what you can find in an Israeli vending machine besides food? Lion of Zion tells us here.
Judaism
Shira Salamone of On the Fringe-Al Tzitzit responds to a recent column and questions what will happen in the Conservative movement and in their communities.

Esther Kustanowitz of My Urban Kvetch asks: “Is this poster real?

Alto Artist of On Chanting wonders how Twitter will fit into the Middle East.

Mominisrael of A Mother in Israel jokingly explains why the “average” Haredi family goes to a hotel for Pesach.

LB of Occidental Israeli tells you to look closely at what your JCC is promoting and addresses the issue of a boycott on Israel.

Jacob Richman of Good News from Israel passes on tons of Passover-related links for our perusal.

Leora of Here in Highland Park is getting into the Twitter thing…here she tweets about the parsha.

A Simple Jew reveals a strategy for dealing with tayvos achila (desire to overeat.)

What do Barnes and Noble and Christian evangelists have to do with one another? Schvach tells us here.

Yisrael Medad of My Right Word posts a video clip of Rabbi Moshe Tendler’s visit to the Temple Mount with explanations. He also tells us about his connection to the new Eldad Hagaddah.

Ima on (and off) the Bima is excited for Passover.
Chabad chimes in this week and says perhaps we should G-d accountable for His actions. (G-d, if you disagree with any of this, I’m just the messenger.) They also discuss Jewish birthdays in honor of Rebbetzin Schneerson.
Mottel of Letters of Thought says don’t scare the kids when teaching about Exodus.

Kashrut
Tuvia of Following My Judaism talks about koshering the kitchen before the upcoming Pesach holiday.
Personal
Ashi and Rami’s blog thanks those who take care of their kids while they’re leading Shabbat at OSU Hillel (Ashi and Rami, not the kids….or “those”. Wow, a doubly ambiguous pronoun. That was crazy. Wild times in Haveil Havalim this week.)

Rachel Barenblat of Velveteen Rabbit releases a collection of miscarriage poems.
Chaviva of Kvetching Editor explains Twitter to her rabbi and reflects on her Shabbat meal.

Mrs. S. of Our Shiputzim: A Work in Progress makes up a tremendous language and tells us about it.

Rahel Jaskow of Elms in the Yard shares a story about finding someone over the internet after many years.

Treppenwitz shares a story called “Man plans and G-d laughs….A multi-generational story.”

Ricki’s Mom of Beneath the Wings describes sending her child to the grocery store. What’s so special about that? (tension building) Click here and see.

What does it feel like to be 40? Jack of Random Thoughts tells us. Don’t worry, Jack, I’ll be writing this post in a handful of years myself (if blogging still exists then. I’m sure we’ll have moved on to something even more ridiculous than Facebook and Twitter like micromini-blogging.

Welcome to our new site, bah.com! “What are you doing in one syllable?”

Jon: BAH!
Melissa: WHEEE!
Dave: RUFF!

If you want to follow me on Twitter, by the way, you can do so here.
)

Shtetl Fabulous describes a recent visit to New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina.

Batya of Me-ander tells a story about dental work and going through a metal detector.

Basement Blogging continues the latest chapter of their story

Politics
Batya of Shiloh Musings asks what the role in the Israeli government should be for Ichud Leumi.

Soccer Dad takes issue with a recent Roger Cohen NYTimes editorial defending Iran (Roger Cohen defends Iran, not Soccer Dad. English can be confusing. Soccer Dad, the explanation at the top of your site made me chuckle.)

Eli of My Panim attends a community meeting and discusses raising kids with a Jewish identity.

Torah
Batya of Shiloh Musings asks who’s really to blame for the sin of the Golden Calf.

The Real Shliach talks about our belief system and uses at least ten words that I’m not familiar with. Could somebody please dumb it down for me?

That concludes this edition. Submit your blog article to the next edition of Haveil Havalim using our carnival submission form. Past posts and future hosts can be found on our blog carnival index page.

Technorati tags: haveil havalim, blog carnival.

The next issue will be hosted by Jack at Random Thoughts.

*Thanks for the tip, Yehoshua and his school furniture. (No easy way to work “school furniture” into a Jewish blog.)

**Thanks Shelly.




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29 Comments

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  1. The Real Shliach March 22, 2009 at 3:25 am #

    Very nice. Which ten words need translating?

  2. Benji Lovitt March 22, 2009 at 3:31 am #

    Hakhel, kofer, and some of the other Jewy ones. They need to stop teaching us useless words like “m’lafefon” in Ulpan. And while we’re at it, maybe someone can tell me why Blogger inserted all the extra spaces in this post.

  3. The Real Shliach March 22, 2009 at 3:34 am #

    Hakhel: Every year following shmita is a year of hakhel. Lubavitch likes to make a big deal out of this.

    http://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/742767/jewish/Hakhel.htm

    Kofer=apikores=heretic.

    Blogger likes to make our lives more fun than they rightfully ought to be.

  4. Mrs. S. March 22, 2009 at 5:12 am #

    Excellent job and thanks for the link!

  5. ilana March 22, 2009 at 6:36 am #

    While I do prefer your (mis)adventures in Israel, I’m in a forgiving mood because I laughed at this post anyway. :-D
    Do you now have photoshop? I just can’t believe that the bank told you “yiyeh b’seder”. Though, this being Israel, I suppose anything is possible (“ani ma’amina b’emunah shlema viviat ha’mashiach…” – and if you don’t know what that refers to, you can ask The Real Shliach).
    Though let me just clarify that I’m not religious or becoming religious, I just like that phrase. I usually repeat it to myself while waiting for a bus changing the appropriate word to “autobus”.
    I guess what you are doing in one syllable is “Tweet”. I would follow your twittering, but since I already follow this blog, I think following your tweet would just be considered stalking.
    Be well and be funny.
    Capcha: unisking

  6. Leora March 22, 2009 at 6:40 am #

    Great HH. Yehiyeh B’Seder (whatever one’s concerns). Wondering how one says split infinitive b’ivrit.

    Thanks for the tweet I mean link, and I will link right back soon.

  7. Ben-Yehudah March 22, 2009 at 6:52 am #

    B”H

    Benji, thanks for hosting and thanks for the links.

    Haveil Havalim #209 Is Up!

    TRS, I’m sure you were just trying to simplify things, but of course, more specifically, a kofer is one who denies any number of aspects of Torah truths, being the Oral Torah, existence of the Almighty, etc.

  8. Mia March 22, 2009 at 7:34 am #

    You don’t watch much Israeli TV do you? Bank Leumi has a whole Yihiye Beseder commercial. You would love it – just turn on Arutz 2 (22) or 10 anytime and they are bound to show it.
    The basic concept is Yihiye Beseder but in the meantime give Bank leumi managment if your money.

  9. The Rebbetzin's Husband March 22, 2009 at 8:34 am #

    Thanks for the links, and for a few good laughs on a Sunday morning that needs them.

  10. ilana March 22, 2009 at 10:31 am #

    Just checking comments (because I read this blog for the comments, you know…) And I totally wouldn’t have commented a second time except the capcha is
    amalik
    Is that weird or what?

    And Mia, I don’t watch a lot of Israeli tv, but I do have the American habit of changing channels during commercials. :-)

  11. Chaviva March 22, 2009 at 12:14 pm #

    Thanks for including me :) Nice job, super funny, and lots of interesting pictures along the way, lol. Bravo!

  12. Jack March 22, 2009 at 1:39 pm #

    Nicely done.

  13. Maya March 22, 2009 at 1:41 pm #

    Nice job!! Except… *gasp*… you split an infinitive in talking about my blog, and I work as an ENGLISH TEACHER! I’m so ashamed! ;) seriously, this was a very funny edition and I appreciate the link.

  14. eli March 22, 2009 at 1:56 pm #

    Spring for you winter for us (melbourne)..hmm that’s a line from
    mel brooks i think
    Thanks for the link,the laugh and the lunacy

  15. Batya March 22, 2009 at 2:35 pm #

    Thank you! Great job.

  16. Schvach March 22, 2009 at 2:43 pm #

    Thanks for linking my post, and for your great HH post.

  17. YMedad March 22, 2009 at 3:53 pm #

    Thanks for me being included. Shows you are a form follower. Way to go. Yihyeh b’seder.

  18. Shtetl Fabulous March 22, 2009 at 4:05 pm #

    Thanks for hosting and including me.

  19. Baila March 22, 2009 at 4:08 pm #

    Hey!!! I didn’t know you were hosting! Totally would have submitted some of my drivel. Ah well….

    It was a fun one.

  20. Mikeinmidwood March 22, 2009 at 4:50 pm #

    great HH.

  21. Phyllis Sommer March 22, 2009 at 10:56 pm #

    nice job:-) thanks!

  22. Soccer Dad March 22, 2009 at 11:50 pm #

    what amuses you? The 10-60 record thing?

    Thanks for linking and nicely done!

  23. Benji Lovitt March 23, 2009 at 12:50 am #

    “Why do I do it? Because I’m Soccer Dad!” Funny.

    Didn’t know the “yiyeh b’seder” thing was also a TV commercial. If I see it, I may throw a shoe at the TV. If it breaks, yiyeh b’seder.

  24. Anthony Reich March 23, 2009 at 7:33 am #

    Thanks for hosting. The downside of yiheye beseder is that right now, it is not. This is the eternal Israeli hope that things will be good even though at the moment it is a little tough. The problem is that tomorrow never seems to come. Yiheye beseder!

  25. ilana March 23, 2009 at 9:44 am #

    Really, I just stopped by to read comments and now the capcha is
    sundoses
    That is just awesome!
    Yiyeh B’seder, indeed.

  26. Lady-Light March 23, 2009 at 10:58 am #

    Benji,
    Funny, funny, funny! -Even though there was not a single post by ME in this (cause I never sent any).
    I have to send the link to this post of yours to my kids (again); The shekel is rising against the dollar as we speak, while your blog post continues to confirm that, yes–יהיה בסדר.
    Meanwhile, sababa to you, too.

  27. Cookie Goddess March 23, 2009 at 4:21 pm #

    i’ve been hearing those leumi ads on the radio (88fm) for a while, and was wondering when you’d take issue with them :)

  28. Aji March 24, 2009 at 3:10 am #

    I recently came accross your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I dont know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.

    Miriam

    http://www.craigslistposter.info

  29. Taru April 5, 2009 at 10:15 pm #

    I recently came accross your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I dont know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.

    Joannah

    http://easypowerpaint.com

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