It’s been ages since my last Times of Israel blog post but after I shared a few jokes on Facebook this morning, I realized I should write them up.
My friend Laura posted a story this morning about some extremists calling for a “Day of Rage”. (This isn’t a mainstream group, we’re talking about people that call themselves the Jerusalem Faction. Allrighty then.) Protesting I’ve heard of but a “Day of Rage”? Come on, people. What better reason than to publish this?
Without further ado, here are the top 10 best things about a Jewish Day of Rage:
10. Springtime rage allows for convenient burning of chametz.
9. “Kol isha” means that tear gas is replaced with Celine Dion’s Greatest Hits.
8. No matter which side you’re on, you still have ten people for mincha
7. When you get worn out from raging, there’s a twenty-minute break for whitefish
6. Counter-protestors are battle-tested from long waits at Israeli post office
5. Opportunity for educational moment by dividing into breakout groups, discussing “sinat chinam”
4. All the follow-up articles asking “why aren’t Jewish millennials coming to rage?”
3. Infighting leads some to break off and form Carlebach and egalitarian rage groups
2. Just next door, babysitting services provided by local USY chapter
1. Before it can get violent, half the group will have to go home to use the toilet
And here’s a good one from 2015, a “more traditional” Day of Rage schedule.